jesus loves me!!!

wat i think

2010-04-24T08:31:00.000-07:00

A friend once told me this.. every time i go clubbing. it takes a little bit of me away. u know wat? i don really give a shit. seriously, so wat if it takes a little bit of me away. at least, that few hours i am enjoying myself.

being in that place i use to be is getting alittle sianz...

being with my friends rocks. fun laugher and madness.

looking forward to the next one man...

Ghost Of Me

2010-03-21T08:15:00.000-07:00

if only i am not tied down by somethings, i would have done more stuffs... i feel so dead...
i really felt it hard to believe in somethings right now...
dont know how to put it.. but, the things that i do... some are dead irrtating.
routine n routine... argh!! more excitment plz!!!!!!!!

fun?? u have not seen the best of me... nuts...

i cant stop thinking. thinking n think. about? haha... somethings...

ecp tml.. doing the wat i'm surpose to do... jog...

song- Ghost of me... Chris daightry.

sunset

2009-11-24T03:26:00.000-08:00

my dad jaz showed me a very beautiful sunset jaz outside my house. looks jaz like this.

i jaz hope i can spend more time with it. reflecting on my life under this wonderful sunset.

wat have i done?

wat am i to you GOD?

2009-11-20T12:41:00.000-08:00

its 4.41am in the morning! why the hack am i awake?!! surpose to be sleeping man.

but anyways, i'm super excited to watch arsenal today!!! wa... after 2 weeks man. damm...

ohya... all of a sudden i forgot where i put my handphone. lol... cant seem to find it.

ok...

come to the serious stuff.

one of my friends ask me if i have ever felt that leaveing was a bad choice.
well my answer was a no.

couple of people around me tried to ask me to go to their church. but was politely turn down.
am i being alittle stubborn or wat??

their lots n lots of things i wanna say. but have no idea how to put it in words.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
wat am i to you GOD?

come back to me

2009-10-05T07:39:00.000-07:00

Come back to me- david cook

You say you gotta go and find yourself
You say that you´re becoming someone else
Don´t recognize the face in the mirror
Looking back at you

You say you´re leavin
As you look away
I know theres really nothin left to say
Just know i´m here
Whenever you need me
I´ll wait for you

So i´ll let you go
I´ll set you free
And when you see what you need to see
When you find you come back to me

Take your time i wont go anywhere
Picture you with the wind in your hair
I´ll keep your things right where you left them
I´ll be here for you

Oh and i´ll let you go
I´ll set you free
And when you see what you need to see
When you find you come back to me

And i hope you find everything that you need
I´ll be right here waiting to see
You find you come back to me

I can´t get close if your not there
I can´t get inside if theres no soul to bear
I can´t fix you i can´t save you
Its something you have to do

So i´ll let you go
I´ll set you free
And when you see what you need to see
When you find you come back to me
Come back to me
So i´ll let you go
I´ll set you free
And when you see what you need to see
When you find you come back to me

And i hope you find everything that you need
I´ll be right here waiting to see
You find you come back to me

When you find you come back to me
When you find you come back to me
When you find you come back to me

the climb

2009-09-16T04:37:00.000-07:00

have u ever hope u can turn back times. so that u can redo the mistakes u make.

i really hope that i difer my ns. i hate it now.

but life's a climb. but the view is great.

THE CLIMB
I can almost see it
That dream I’m dreaming but
There’s a voice inside my head sayin,
You’ll never reach it,
Every step I’m taking,
Every move I make feels
Lost with no direction
My faith is shaking but I
Got to keep tryin
Got to keep my head held high

There’s always going to be another mountain
I’m always going to want to make it move
Always going to be an uphill battle,
Sometimes I'm going to have to lose,
Ain’t about how fast I get there,
Ain’t about what’s waiting on the other side
It’s the climb

The struggles I’m facing,
The chances I’m taking
Sometimes they might knock me down but
No I’m not breaking
I may not know it
But these are the moments that
I’m going to remember most yeah
Just got to keep going
And I,
I got to be strong
Just keep pushing on,
cause

There’s always going to be another mountain
I’m always going to want to make it move
Always going to be an uphill battle,
Sometimes I'm going to have to lose,
Ain’t about how fast I get there,
Ain’t about what’s waiting on the other side
It’s the climb

There’s always going to be another mountain
I’m always going to want to make it move
Always going to be an uphill battle,
Sometimes you're going to have to lose,
Ain’t about how fast I get there,
Ain’t about what’s waiting on the other side
It’s the climb

Keep on moving
Keep climbing
Keep the faith baby
It’s all about
It’s all about
The climb
Keep the faith
Keep your faith

POC OH!!!

2009-08-21T20:04:00.000-07:00

finally i have POC already. been posted to k9 unit.
but thinking back of my life during my 6 months of bpt training. its madness.

i went in at march. feeling quite emo during the first two weeks. but during the first book out. its was like being in heaven when u reach home.

than comes my first book in. wa... the feeling is very bad man.

than soon comes april. when a news strike me right in my heart that shock me for 1 or 2 mins. that i was chosen for ndp 09.

than the training starts for ndp. it was very tiring i must say. but every saturday, u feel at least a little bit of satisfaction.

here comes june, these is when the real training starts. endureing super hot sun. jaz for the actually day.

the actual day. it is something that i will remember for the rest of my life. the bond we made. the friendship that we made. the marching. people watching u. both live and on tv. the feeling is beond words.

than POC OH!!!!!!!!!!!! the feeling is damm good. finally no more a trainee. now, as u are being posted out. must be extra careful. but it is going to be an exciting time of my life before i ord.

and lastly,
POC OH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2009-06-14T10:01:00.000-07:00

i have been thinking about wat has been in my spritual life.

seriously, i have given up on being in this church of mine. dissapointments after dissapointments.
till the day when a major set back and your heart jaz says its enough. so u decided to leave. but think of it. there r your friends there. than there is the church i use to go. which i find that i am more suitable to attend. frankly spraking, can u be under someone leadership who don derserve your respect?

should i change? together with my family. or should i stay? that is still a big question mark...

the love of a mum and a dad

2009-05-28T07:18:00.000-07:00

the love of a mother and the strength of a father.

ever since i been to the ns. i have learn to tresure my family even more. so much more.

it make me realise how much i really love them. which i have not been seeing for the pass few years of my life.

the love of a mother is what i really wanna say right here.
the love of a mother, really give u the courage to fight things that are coming. and to endure everything thrown to you.
the small little things my mum said and do. make my heart soften. and many a times i jaz wanna say i love you mum. but i am saving to a particular special day.

the strength of a father. its really really powerful. it give you the strength to do great things. many powerful stuffs.
also many a times i jaz wanna give my dad a big hug and say. thanks dad and i love you. truely.

frankly speaking, i give my life for this two very special person in my life.

who was there when u are really down? who can look in too your eyes and stright away say. hey, wat happen? without you feeling werid and all.

my sisters, both who i have think of everyday. both special in my heart. who always say i love you to me.

who am i say that i dont love them?

i love them dearly. i jaz keep it in my heart. waiting for the right day to say i love you too.

an eye opener to me.

now i know wat family really means.

a question for u people out there. who do u really run or cry to when u are really in need. your family or your friends?

a simple and diffcult question to answer.

Over you

2009-04-12T00:52:00.000-07:00

Chrleston ask me who i like. and when i saw your face. your face tells everything.

so this song came running through my mind.

Over you/Chris Daughtry

Now that it's all said and done,
I can't believe you were the one
To build me up and tear me down,
Like an old abandoned house.
What you said when you left
Just left me cold and out of breath.
I fell too far, was in way too deep.
Guess I let you get the best of me.

Well, I never saw it coming.
And I should've started running
A long, long time ago.
And I never thought I'd doubt you,
I'm better off without you
More than you, more than you know.
I'm slowly getting closure.
I guess it's really over.
I'm finally getting better.
And now I'm picking up the pieces.
From spending all of these years
Putting my heart back together.
'Cause the day I thought I'd never get through,
I got over you.

You took a hammer to these walls,
Dragged the memories down the hall,
Packed your bags and walked away.
There was nothing I could say.
And when you slammed the front door shut,
A lot of others opened up,
So did my eyes so I could see
That you never were the best for me.

Well, I never saw it coming.
And I should've started running
A long, long time ago.
And I never thought I'd doubt you,

I'm better off without you
More than you, more than you know.
I'm slowly getting closure.
I guess it's really over.
I'm finally getting better.
And now I'm picking up the pieces.
From spending all of these years
Putting my heart back together.
'Cause the day I thought I'd never get through,
I got over you.

Well, I never saw it coming.
And I should've started running
A long, long time ago.
And I never thought I'd doubt you,
I'm better off without you
More than you, more than you know.

Well, I never saw it coming.
And I should've started running
A long, long time ago.
And I never thought I'd doubt you,
I'm better off without you
More than you, more than you know.
I'm slowly getting closure.
I guess it's really over.
I'm finally getting better.
And now I'm picking up the pieces.
From spending all of these years
Putting my heart back together.
Well I'm putting my heart back together,
'Cause I got over you.
Well I got over you.
I got over you.
'Cause the day I thought I'd never get through,
I got over you.

my heart still race when i see you. but i know this have to happen.

missing you

2009-04-05T00:35:00.000-07:00

there are alot of thinks that are flooding my mind and things that are bordering my heart.

my main concern is her. i hope that soon i can tell her that i love her.

when i'm in camp. the song that keep strikeing my heart is 3 doors down-here without you.

wat am i going to say to u when i see u? when u look me in the eye. my heart will race.

service yesterday taught me something. to pray for u. i will.

song-i hate this part-P.C.D

2009-03-08T22:21:00.000-07:00

tml its ns already. now that i jaz realise that my ex secondary classmate is also going in the same time as me make me more excited to go.

but a couple of things are on my mind right now.

my cg mates-argh!!! i will miss them like mad.

my family- also will miss them alot.

Her(some of u know who)- she is the main thing on my mind and heart right now.

my very good friend told me on sunday that that will even make me wanna book out of camp even more.

she's 200% right. i have not even go to ns and i already wanna book out from camp.

missing u always.

song-nickleback- Far Away

2009-03-05T08:28:00.000-08:00

i have already plan out wat i am going to do during this 4 days to ns.

starting from today. since its already 6 of march.

day 1(friday)- wake up early in the morning and follow mum to the market to get the bbq stuffs for this saturday.

day 2(saturday)- bbq!!!

day 3(sunday)- church!! for the last time before enlisment. gonna spent the whole day there man.

day 4 (monday)- the whole day at home!!

the next day. enlistment day. =)

song- would you be there- redwan ali.

Lyrics to would you be there
If I were blue, would you be there for me,
And whisper in my ears that's ok.
Would you stand by me, let me hold you tight,
And say you love me one more time.

If I feel good, would you slow dance with me,
And touch my lips with tender loving care,
Would you die for me, would you run with me,
And never look back..

Would you be there to love, to be with me?
Would you swear that your love is always true?
Would you say that you'll always be the one,
to take my breath away?

Would you be there to love, to be with me?
Would you swear that your love is always true?
Would you say that you'll always be the one,
to take my breath away?

Would you be there..

If I am away, would you still think of me,
And wished that you could hold me now.
Would you die for me, would you run with me,
All the way ...

Would you be there to love, to be with me?
Would you swear that your love is always true?
Would you say that you'll always be the one,
to take my breath away?

Would you be there to save my soul tonight,
Would you swear that your love is always true,
Would you say that you always be there,
To kiss my pain away,

Would you be there to love, to be with me?
Would you swear that your love is always true?
Would you say that you'll always be the one,
to take my breath away?

Would you be there to save my soul tonight,
Would you swear that your love is always true,
Would you say that you always be there,
To kiss my pain away,

Would you be there ..... for me ...

5 more days.

2009-03-04T09:10:00.000-08:00

its 5 more days till ns. and ya... i'm counting down.

the emotion is already kicking in.

the fact that u are going to the unknown its truly right in your face. a whole knew life right smack in your face.

but it is this that u start to really trust God with everything that u have.

than u tell God. u tell Him. God everything its in your hands. let your will be done. not mine.
and wat ever happen, i'm still gonna praise You.

it is then u really hope to jaz catch up with your old friends. which is happening this saturday.

i hate the part when u feel like this.

come on gerald. u tell yourself.

but its time to face the fact.

song-i hate this part-P.C.D

2009-03-02T07:57:00.000-08:00

i feel very bad not hitting the gym. but its ok...

8 more days man to ns!!

song- i do-98 drgrees

2009-02-28T08:37:00.000-08:00

the fact that u have to go ns. u know, u know that u are going to miss everything that u ever tresure which u cant get when u are in the ns.

9 more days to my enlisment day.

during service. i teared. touch by God. the thought of i going to ns jaz kicks in and as i said u are going to miss everything u ever tresure.

than u ask me. so wat are u going to miss?

my answer to u is the presence of God. and the people.

people like mong- who will say lame things to make u laugh. and share your heart to.
henry- who can always irritate. and some times share your heart to.
matthew- who u can jaz talk all day long. because we share so many things in common.
shi han- who knows more of the songs u know. some being so lame that u can total lol.
desmond-who u can share your heart to.
etc... as in u will miss more people lah...

i have lots to post. but am very tired right now.

gtg sleep. see ya. =)

NS

2009-02-26T09:17:00.000-08:00

watching jaz the theme video of band of brothers. i felt so pump up and ready to go for ns. although i will not be in the man in green. but i am seen as a man in blue. a man who will defend singapore law and people.

looking back, i am sure most or all of u have played police and theft when u are young. and i dunno how many of u have ever thought or am insired to become a policeman.

i once had it. and plus being so inspired to become like my dad. the desire of me being in the force grows.

some people around me will thing i'm mad.
not much freedom. this and that.

but have u ever thought to yourself. something further than that?

have u ever thought that if one day your counrty ever go to war.
will u be some ordinary man being lead by a sergent. or do u want to be some one greater? so when that ever happen. u can make an impact like the band of brothers.

to me. its not about the money, the job stablelity or wat so ever. but its defending wat u love.

and even if u dont wan to sign on. why not make this 2 years something special so that u can tell your kids and your grandchildren in the future.

for those who are in the position who are well respected. dont ever let go of the opprtunaity.

yes. there are things u have to give up. but these are the things that will make u tresure life and things even more.

lol,
Gerald

2009-02-23T07:56:00.000-08:00

i'm always surprise wat God can always tell u and tell u wat to do.

but this really caught me by surprise. as some of u know already. i am the top 25% in my school.
so i can get $400.

as i was so excited to get the things i want. a ipod nano. i already pick the colour i want.

but God has other plans for me. after listening from pastor how about ai. God started to probe my heart. He told me. why not give $300 to the children? i was shock. but soon recovered from it.

but i chose to obey Him. why not? u can change at least 7 child life man. seriosuly.

song- chris daughtry-wat about now

2009-02-21T09:50:00.000-08:00

i jaz came back from AFC not long ago. wa... it was such a dissapointing match.

it can be easyly been 2-0. but that did not happen.

but something did caught my eye. while i was watching the match with my bro in-law and sis. this guy was curseing and swaering. really. to the extend that it became a joke.

but anyways, a draw its a draw.

2009-02-20T16:01:00.000-08:00

its been awhile that i really post about arsenal. so this is wat have been going on.

Arsenal bought a new player. arshavin.

and those injured players are slowly but surely makeing a come back. player like rosicky,fabregas,walcott,eduardo. which the max time of the player makeing a return is 1 month. ohya... edurado played his first match last week in the fa cup. and when i watch the match. i cant help but feel that this is how arsenal should play. and that is one of the main reason why i really love arsenal so much.

but the bad thing is. when all of them come back to the first team after their injuries. i will be in ns!!! argh!! so i cant really watch the first team play for a while. which is basically quite sianz.

anyways, i think that is all for now. gtg. going to gym lao... see ya...

2009-02-19T05:33:00.000-08:00

i jaz have this sudden conviction. that when i am married with my wife and children. i will never ever use any vaugular at my wife or children.

i mean its quite common to have couples argue. but to me useing vaugular at my wife is too much.

seriously man.

far away

2009-02-15T06:45:00.000-08:00

sitting here on my chair. thinking and thinking, my mind is raceing, with so many things i wanna write about but dont know where to start.

waiting for an insperation.

oh... here it comes.

i suddenly thought of alvin. and him about to comission soon.

than i felt suddenly so inspired to be in his position. ya...

people will say i'm mad. but i think to myself and will tell them. why not? its a life changeing experence that few will experence.

than i think again. about me. going to go to the ns in about 3 weeks time. than u are hit by two mix feelings. wat kind? happy and sadness.

than u ask,how do u feel happy and the same time sad?

see, happy because that u are going to ns. a whole new thing in your life.

sad because u cant hang out with your friends as and when u want. also u cant see your love ones so often. winifred and shi hui should know wat am i talking about.

being so near but yet so far from them seems so hard. i will miss you guys!!!

argh!! the bad part about ns is sinking in already.

its ok... i will enjoy it. =)

song-far away-nickleback

looking to the future

2009-02-13T08:25:00.000-08:00

i have alot of things in my mind right now. i jaz dunno how to start.

ok...

here we go. i wanted to post like yesterday. after i came back from gym.

so... i was gyming. and as i was doing cardio. part of me was thinking about somethig else. something important. i cant help it. henry should know wat i am thinking about.

than u decided to push yourself to the limit so that u can forget everthing for the moment.

but how many know that it dont work. i did the bench press. again pushing myself to the limit again. but it does not help.

again i did things push myself to the limit. but it happen again.

so at the end of the about 2 hours of gyming. i went home with my body tired.

so, u think. about wat u wanna do. the things happening. and the things in the past.

the future looks so exciting. the now its fun. but the past its carzy.

but u have to look forward. to the future.

henry told me alot of things today. something that caught my attention. that i really look forward to.

also, today, jo jaz finish his 2 weeks of confiment. its the first time i saw him in two weeks. very happy to see him. ya...

anyways, gtg

song-far away-nickleback

haha

2009-02-09T06:40:00.000-08:00

i was in malaysia erly this moning and afternoon. with of course my mum,mum's friend, me, jen and zhi wei. so... this is wat happen.

we were shopping for somethings. so we came across the facial mask. so this is the conve.

me- hey! wat are u looking at?
oh... its facial mask.
why not u buy it?

zhi wei- its whiteing man. u wan me tobecome ghost ah?

me- totally lol...

the way he said it ah... damm funny. i cant stop laughing for the next 2 mins or so.

ohya.. i bought this perfume for mans. its from lambo. super nice smell. really.

gtg... bb

enlisting to the ns

2009-02-08T07:44:00.000-08:00

as the time draws near for me to enlist to the ns. i suddenly felt that i have to spent more time with my cg mates. i dunno why. but suddenly i felt that i can get to know them better. i enoy their company.

jaz yesterday, i took pics with a couple of people so that i can see them when i miss them in camp.

i feel that we are slowly getting to know each other more. but still...

the mix feelings of excitment and sadness because i will be enlisting and that is wat i want it. but sad because i will not be able to spent time with c1 and c3.

song- i hate this part-pussycat dolls.

sprinting

2009-02-06T07:58:00.000-08:00

i jaz came back from sprinting jaz now. sprint around 1.2km like that. super shiok.

i mean u sprint in the night, not in the sun. its peace and quiet. only the cool night breeze.

also, sprinting also allows u to keep your mind off something. as u are concentrating on jaz reaching your goal. yea...

ohya... i jaz got my patrick soft toy. its super cute lah... really.

anyways, gtg already. got to wake up early to go to gym man. bye.

getting fifa 09 and patrick starfish soft toy

2009-02-04T07:10:00.000-08:00

i wanna get the fifa arsenal edition. super cool lor...

hit the gym today. alot of people man. wa...

anwyays, hows my week? two words. ok lor... haha...

ohya.. i jaz realise that chinese herbs are SUPER EXPENSIVE!!! ya man...

so i told my dad that only have it once every year. ya man...

ohya... i also wanna get the patrick starfish soft toy. super cute man. argh!! cannot take it.

gtg

home

2009-02-03T08:22:00.000-08:00

i really like this song. home by daughtry.

my mind is flooding images about the girl i like.
hmm... i dunno why.

thinking back and now

2009-02-02T08:27:00.000-08:00

have u ever reach a point where u will stop or slow down in life for awhile and look back in life?

well i do.

wat happen. i got a package from ite regarding my graduation. than i suddenly thought of life in ite.

actually. when u are in school. u always jaz wanna to faster leave school. but when u actually graduated from school and think back. u suddenly think of the carzyest time u had. the stupid things u do to each other. haiz... till now when i think back. i will smile and hope that it is that time again.

than now when u are here. and thinking of what your classmates and friends are doing. some are working full time as a regular in the ns. some are going to the ns. some are going to futher their studies.

suddenly u feel all grown up. part of me now miss those times. when we disturp each other. said the carzest remarkes about each other but its soso funny. the things they said.
wow...

but as i said, we have grown up. and move on in time.
than here i am. sitting on the chair on my lappy updateing my blog once again. and look at the calendar and u are surprise that it is already feb 09. and when u look back at feb 08. its jaz carzy.

as i am waiting to enlist for ns. the arge of not going to miss my friends jaz die.
i have no idea. last year i did not really care about it. that i will be going ns. its jaz to me that time so far fetch.

but now. its only about 5 weeks away. and i already have this feeling of missing my cg mates. alot.

although i will be enjoying my time in ns. i will be still thinking of my family,my cg mates and the person i like.

u know wat. i think i wll be very greatful to those who went to cck on march 10 to see me to pa.
i will be especally happy if she come.

somethings i cant really say right now. not because i don wanna say. i jaz find it hard to come out with the words to say.

song now-you and me-lifehouse

lyrics to you and me.

What day is it? And in what month?
This clock never seemed so alive
I can't keep up and I can't back down
I've been losing so much time

Cause it's you and me and all of the people with nothing to do
Nothing to lose
And it's you and me and all of the people
And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you

All of the things that I want to say just aren't coming out right
I'm tripping on words
You've got my head spinning
I don't know where to go from here

Cause it's you and me and all of the people with nothing to do
Nothing to prove
And it's you and me and all of the people
And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you

There's something about you now
I can't quite figure out
Everything she does is beautiful
Everything she does is right

Cause it's you and me and all of the people with nothing to do
Nothing to lose
And it's you and me and all of the people
And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you
and me and all of the people with nothing to do
Nothing to prove
And it's you and me and all of the people
And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you

What day is it?
And in what month?
This clock never seemed so alive

2009-01-30T07:09:00.000-08:00

i have no idea wat i should to put on my title and how to start. but i know i should.

frankly speaking, this is the first time. i ever felt like this for a girl. its not jaz the looks that captivate me. put its her attitude. how she do things. her thinking. her everything. and seriously, i dont see any cons about her. my heart longs to see her everyday.

this is the first time i am serious for a girl.

call me mad, call me carzy, call me madly in love.

but u know wat. i am. i am madly in love.

i wanna say to her. i miss you, i love you.

here's the lyrics to the song i am listening now.

song-far away-nickleback

This time, This place
Misused, Mistakes
Too long, Too late
Who was I to make you wait
Just one chance
Just one breath
Just in case there's just one left
'Cause you know,
you know, you know

[CHORUS]
That I love you
I have loved you all along
And I miss you
Been far away for far too long
I keep dreaming you'll be with me
and you'll never go
Stop breathing if
I don't see you anymore

On my knees, I'll ask
Last chance for one last dance
'Cause with you, I'd withstand
All of hell to hold your hand
I'd give it all
I'd give for us
Give anything but I won't give up
'Cause you know,
you know, you know

[CHORUS]

So far away
Been far away for far too long
So far away
Been far away for far too long
But you know, you know, you know

I wanted
I wanted you to stay
'Cause I needed
I need to hear you say
That I love you
I have loved you all along
And I forgive you
For being away for far too long
So keep breathing
'Cause I'm not leaving you anymore
Believe it
Hold on to me and, never let me go
Keep breathing
'Cause I'm not leaving you anymore
Believe it
Hold on to me and, never let me go
Keep breathing
Hold on to me and, never let me go
Keep breathing
Hold on to me and, never let me go

thinking about u

2009-01-29T08:25:00.000-08:00

i was jogging jaz now. and my whole mind was full of images of u.

i kept thinking. thinking. i cant help it.

hmm... wat should i do?

song-always be my baby-david cook

will you?

2009-01-28T18:59:00.000-08:00

i will be enlisting to ns in about 1 and half months. if u ask me wats my wish before i enlist.

it will be. to go out with u alone.

and to see u before i enlist.

thats wat i hope. really.

song-lights on-david cook.

day out with c1 and c3

2009-01-23T08:42:00.000-08:00

went to watch movie with c1 and c3. watch love matters.

its quite funny man. seriously.

was on the way to meet shi hui brother when i suddenly miss the girl i like.

the feeling strike me. suddenly.

than when i was on the way home. i thought of her. only her.

have she ever think of me? is she thinking of me right now. do i ever cross your mind?
do u like me?

that is the big question.

i don know much i can take.

the only thing i can do now is wait. wait for the time when i can say the beautiful three words that will cahnge our lives. i love you. only you.

miss you...

i realise

2009-01-20T06:56:00.000-08:00

i went to church on sunday. went for cg first. wow... it changemy whole life.

although the message was about incubating people. i felt different.

i felt that hte fire is slowly but surely growing. like wat i use to experence when i first was save in h.o.g.c.

God told me alot of things. He said that this eyar i will grow alot but its is going to be hard.

i ask yassy. and she told me alot of things.

i was in a way blown away by wat she said.

so i seriously cant wait.

really.

anyways, i realise that many of our guys are going to ns this year!! there will be jt. who is already in ns. than will be jo, henry, me,mong, sean,ming jian. wa... lets not include those who are already in ns in c1.

also, i really wanna go and watch one of the arsenal match in mount e soon!!

gtg. bb

two days out.

2009-01-14T07:31:00.000-08:00

yesterday, met joshua, my secondary school friend. lol.. lots to catch up with.

wanted to catch a movie. but don have the movie we wanted. so we go and hang around.

than at around 4 oclock i went back to secondary school.

talk to miss ang and mr heng. its quite enjoyable to talk to mr heng again. because some how mr heng an myself can really click. to me, its quite rare to see student and teacher tlak like they are buddies. haha.. it cool.

ohya... than here comes today. met up with joshua again. find out more about him again. although joshua and myself are really good friends back than. but people change u know. so we went to catch this tony jaa show. wa... its damm good i tell u. all the fighting and all.

but anyways, than went to meet desmond. chat with him and stuffs. kind of funny.

oh.... as i was on my way home jaz now. elijah sms me. talk about how our ite lives have been.

to tell u the truth. i kind of miss hanging out with them. the lame things that we do and say.
its really very funny.

than i thought to myself.(mybe i watch to much heros already).

but anyways, i think back. i really wanna go back to the pass and redo some wat i regrat not doing. and go back to those time when we were having so much fun.

i miss those days!!!

but i know i have to move on. i have to.

anyways, gtg. see ya. =)

song-always be my baby-david cook.

the real thing

2009-01-12T05:28:00.000-08:00

i heard this song. and i totally like it lah...

but anyways, i wanna start by saying this.

there is a couple of things i wanna do from now till the end of this year.

1. learn the electric guitar. and be very good at it.

2. pick up singing.(to sing for the one i love)

3. be so much closer to my parents.

4. be so much closer to my friends too.

5. sign on during my bmt!!

thats all!!

this song is for u.

i will play it for u and record it on studio. i will.

here is the lyrics to the song

song. bo bice- the real thing.

THE REAL THING.
Every word I say, I mean it
Every single day, I feel it

But sometimes when you talk
It's obvious you want to show it
So don't blow it

[Chorus:]
Tell me what we got, tell me it's a lot tell me it's the real thing
Tell me not to change and always be the same, tell me that's a good thing
It's a good thing
Tell me not to lie, tell me not to wait
Tell me that you want the same things as me
Tell me that it's fate driving me insane
Tell me it's the real thing
That keeps me hangin on

I can read the signs between us
I feel it inside when you come nearer
There's a stillness in the air like no one else is there
And every moment stays in the moment
Yeah

[Chorus:]
Tell me what we got, tell me it's a lot tell me it's the real thing
Tell me not to change and always be the same, tell me that's a good thing
It's a good thing
Tell me not to lie, tell me not to wait
Tell me that you want the same things as me
Tell me that it's fate, driving me insane
Tell me it's the real thing
That keeps me hangin on

Sometimes it hurts to watch you leave
It feels like you're taking a part of me with you
I never know how it'll be
I guess it's just a mystery
But is it the real thing (that keeps me hangin on)

[Chorus:]
Tell me what we got, tell me it's a lot, tell me it's the real thing
Tell me not to change and always be the same, tell me that's a good thing
It's a good thing
Tell me not to lie, tell me not to wait
Tell me that you want the same things as me
Tell me that it's fate, driving me insane
Tell me it's the real thing
That keeps me hangin on

Tell me what we got, tell me it's a lot, tell me it's the real thing
Tell me not to change and always be the same, tell me that's a good thing
It's a good thing
Tell me not to lie, tell me not to wait
Tell me that you want the same things as me
Tell me that it's fate, driving me insane
Tell me it's the real thing
The real thing

2009-01-10T09:10:00.000-08:00

i saw u today. i was blown away. i really hope time can jaz stop when i look at u and u look back.

but wat could i say. but only to wait. wait for the right time. the right time to say. i love you. to you only.

i came back home. walking home from the mrt.

i miss you. the feeling that says... i jaz miss you.

i really wonder. wat is happening to the heart of yours. do u feel the same way i feel for you.

are u thinking of me at these moment?
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

also, i felt uneasy today. as in the scar that is in me. the huge cut in my heart. emotionaly. seems that someone or something is healing it or something.

in a way its good. but i dont like it. it felt uneasy.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

i was in church today. i felt like a stranger. that i was very far from him. but as i quiet down for a while. i felt Him saying. why, are u so stubborn? why?

than He said, but behind all of that. i see strength.

u know. i saw this friend today. i felt so far from him. we saw each other. and did not even talk to each other. i walk pass him and he did the same.

there are somethings that are not very convinent to say it right over here. i hope that i can really share this to someone that i can really trust.

gtg.

bikes!

2009-01-08T07:05:00.000-08:00

i have another love. apart from u know who,arsenal and cars.

now is bikes!! i saw this bike. kawasaki zz1400 08. its damm nice. its wat i call to me. pure power.

serious. its cool. but i know wat u gonna say. wat about harley davidson?

ya... it has diff kind of wat i like. for harley. its the engine sound. its pure shiokness. it make u feel very wa.... u look damm cool rideing on one. serious.

anyways, yesterday, met pan for dinner after meet si hui and girls in the library.

then when i went home. i took bus 52. i saw tresha. and her mum of course.

talk to her and stuffs. than, i told her that i will be enlisting at march 10. she was suggesting that a couple of us have dinner or something. ya...

anyways, gtg. damm lazy on how i feel right now.

song- bon jovi- i'll be there for you.

what about now?

2009-01-06T09:27:00.000-08:00

i am kind of starting to like this game l4d. its fun. shoot zombies and stuffs.

i was asking myself as i was coming back.

can i leave carry on. carry on with the walk.

i used to have fun. lots of it.

as i look back. i sometimes ask myself. is this all worth it...

anyways, will be at home the whole day tml. dont really wan to go out actually. kind of lazy.

yea... ohya... wanna tell u ah...

u should try this. at this timeing ah... the evening time ah... u should listen to trance u know. damm power.

i like. the feeling its diff if u listen to it in the day. especally if u are driving.

although i don drive. i experence it. listening to trance in the car. super nice. trust me. really.

dont listen to the lyrics lah... listen to the music. power sia....

anyways, gtg. bb

a day back in church

2009-01-04T05:20:00.002-08:00

hey people. and ya... i and updateing me blog in church. brought my laptop to church.

funny huh?

i know some of u are asking me why am i doing back here.

frankly speaking i have no idea.

i came today. felling abit irrtated.

but i guess that when i come here. i can feel at peace. put aside the friends.

as now, i am sitting alone here updateing my blog. i feel myself. like i have been lost for awhile and have been back again.

i recently read yassy blog. and she said about fish in the water or something.

i felt like it. i felt like being back in to my water again.

its like, when i am out in the world. i felt different. doing things that i some times don wanna do.

but when i am back here. i felt better. at least there is someone there. for me. which is desmond. whom is like richard to me.

speaking about richard. as i was at service just now i thought of him. i keep having this picture in my mind there he will be back. the face of my all time best friend.

i look up. to God. and He said. he will be back. for sure.

i cried. and knowing in my heart that the scar is healing. for sure. slowly.

anyways, gtg. will update more tml. see ya. =)

what you got if u ain't got love.

2009-01-02T06:45:00.000-08:00

wow. this song i heard from carrie underwood really reflects on my feelings right now.

so here is the lyrics.

So Small lyrics

Yeah, Yeah

[Verse 1]
What you got if you ain't got love
the kind that you just want to give away
It's okay to open up
go ahead and let the light shine through
I know it's hard on a rainy day
you want to shut the world out and just be left alone
But don't run out on your faith

[Chorus]
'Cause sometimes that mountain you've been climbing is just a grain of sand
What you've been up there searching for
forever is in your hands
When you figure out love is all that matters after all
It sure makes everything else
seem so small

[Verse 2]
It's so easy to get lost inside
a problem that seems so big at the time
it's like a river thats so wide
it swallows you whole
While you sit around thinking about what you can't change
and worrying about all the wrong things
time's flying by
moving so fast
you better make it count 'cause you can't get it back

[Chorus]
Sometimes that mountain you've been climbing is just a grain of sand
What you've been up there searching for
forever is in your hands
When you figure out love is all that matters after all
It sure makes everything else
Seem so small

Sometimes that mountain you've been climbing is just a grain of sand
What you've been up there searching for
forever is in your hands
When you figure out love is all that matters after all
It sure makes everything else
Oh it sure makes everything else
Seem so small

Yeah, Yeah

used to

2009-01-01T08:04:00.000-08:00

something strike me jaz now.

something i thought i never would have thought.

is there someone. who is better than me for you.

if yes. and if u are happy. i wish u all the best.

i dont wan to think every night before i go to bed that tml something special will happen.

no. this have to stop.

now with a new purpose in life. i hope to go forward. with nothing to hold me back. nothing.

with nothing to count on only my family. i have to give u up. i have to.

its heart breaking. i know. i know.

song- chris daughtry- over you.

2008-12-30T09:06:00.001-08:00

went to watch movie with c1 and c3 guys and girls. watch the bed time story. not bad a show.

after that went to play arcade. well i did not play lah... cause i don have the card.

than desmond and i left and walk around. than we walk to ps. talk.

than we went home. wa... tell u ah... the 502 super long sia...

anyways, its 1.02am at the 31 dec 08. tml its the 1st jan 09.

but wat happen is. today! got to go to my cousin birthday party. frankly speaking. i dont really wan to go. cause i know that i cant really do anything there! seriously. i'm sick of watching tv.

ohya... i think alot of people knows that one particular person likes me already. lol...

kind of funny. tihehehe...

anyways, i kind of miss the one i really love. i hope the see u again.

song- wang lee hom- kiss goodbye.

random

2008-12-27T09:44:00.000-08:00

i was so sianz yesterday night that i started to take pics of my arsenal jeresy. its damm nice lah... with my name and the no. 8 printed on this year away jereasy.

oh... my niece came yesterday. wa i tell u. she is a handfull man seriously. i am like super tired after she went home lah...

went to fetch sis with zhi wei today. than make friends with jen friends. wa the are a whole lot of fun man. serious.

hope to meet up with them soon.

here without you.

2008-12-26T22:18:00.000-08:00

i'm here without you.

A hundred days have made me older
Since the last time that I saw your pretty face
A thousand lies have made me colder
And I don't think I can look at this the same
But all the miles that separate
Disappear now when I'm dreaming of your face

I'm here without you baby
But you're still on my lonely mind
I think about you baby
And I dream about you all the time
I'm here without you baby
But you're still with me in my dreams
And tonight it's only you and me

The miles just keep rollin'
As the people leave their way to say hello
I've heard this life is overrated
But I hope that it gets better as we go

I'm here without you baby
But you're still on my lonely mind
I think about you baby
And I dream about you all the time
I'm here without you baby
But you're still with me in my dreams
And tonight girl it's only you and me

Everything I know, and anywhere I go
It gets hard but it wont take away my love
And when the last one falls
When it's all said and done
It gets hard but it wont take away my love

I'm here without you baby
But you're still on my lonely mind
I think about you baby
And I dream about you all the time
I'm here without you baby
But you're still with me in my dreams
And tonight girl it's only you and me

also,

nickleback. gotta be somebody.

This time, I wonder what it feels like
To find the one in this life, the one we all dream of
But dreams just aren't enough
So I'll be waiting for the real thing, I'll know it by the feeling
The moment when we're meeting, will play out like a scene
Straight off the silver screen
So I'll be holding my own breath, right up 'til the end
Until that moment when, I find the one that I'll spend forever with

Cause nobody wants to be the last one there
Cause everyone wants to feel like someone cares
Someone to love with my life in their hands
There's Gotta Be Somebody for me like that
Cause nobody wants to do it all on their own
And everyone wants to know they're not alone
There's somebody else that feels the same somewhere
There's gotta be somebody for me out there

Tonight, out on the street, out in the moonlight
And dammit this feels too right, it's just like deja vu
Me standing here with you
So I'll be holding my own breath, could this be the end
Is it that moment when, I find the one that I'll spend forever with

Cause nobody wants to be the last one there
Cause everyone wants to feel like someone cares
[ Gotta Be Somebody lyrics from http://www.lyricsyoulove.com/ ]
Someone to love with my life in their hands
There's gotta be somebody for me like that
Cause nobody wants to do it all on their own
And everyone wants to know they're not alone
There's somebody else that feels the same somewhere
There's gotta be somebody for me out there

You can't give up, looking for a diamond in the rough
You never know,when it shows up, make sure you're holding on
Cause it could be the one, the one you're waiting on
Cause nobody wants to be the last one there
And everyone wants to feel like someone cares
Someone to love with my life in their hands
There's gotta be somebody for me, oh

Nobody wants to do it all on their own
And everyone wants to know the night alone
There's somebody else that feels the same somewhere
There's gotta be somebody for me out there
Nobody wants to be the last one there
Cause everyone wants to feel like someone cares
There's somebody else that feels the same somewhere
There's gotta be somebody for me out there
___________________________________________________________________

frankly speaking there is two person that can bring me back. will not tell who.

finally!

2008-12-25T08:07:00.000-08:00

went to aunts house today. than went to marnia square with deon, ann, aunt amy and jen plus zhi wei.

both jen and zhi wei went off first.

but as we were sitting at kfc eating. we starting chatting. i ask deon. how come his not in church.

actually, all of us share alot of things in common.

seriously.

man. finally. someone to share wat i'm feeling.
do something.

song- daughtry-what about now.

wat the?

2008-12-24T12:13:00.000-08:00

its 4.07 am in the morning. am i am here blogging. werid huh?

oh... merry chrismas people!!!

hmm... reflecting back on the pass year.

kind of think of it. its kind of cool. why?

my relationship with my family memebers are so much closer. i have made so many new friends these year.

so ya.... oh.. will be down to my aunts house later for christmas. cant wait. to see and talk to my cousins again.

ohya... as i was collectin my jereasy form printing at queensway yesterday afternoon.
i suddenly thought of something.

something called 'freedom'.

wat is freedom?

well to me its. haveing nothing to pull you or hold u back from doing wat u want to do.

u see. many people wan to do things. but they are thinking. oh.. later i cant be this. later i cant be that.

i sick of that. if u wanna do it. go!!!

ya...

gerald out.

missing u

wa cow!

2008-12-22T06:02:00.000-08:00

i jaz came to rellise that even me makeing my own friends also have to go through a whole lot of crap.

wat happen. its because of yesterday. we went to afc and watch soccer.

than come a couple of my friends. whom they smoke.

so i have no idea whom. told my dad that my friends smoke.

so basically. i was like. as long as i don smoke its ok already wat. so why do they have to make a big fust out of it?

if i wanna smoke. i would have done it like when i was in sec 2 when my classmate offer me to smoke.

come on. i have my own principle.

why am i angry?

its because i am freaking dissapointed that at this age. have no 100% freedom in makeing my own friends.

damm!

draw match

2008-12-21T10:47:00.000-08:00

well. i jaz came back from a disspointing match. between arsenal and liverpool.

its a 1-1 draw.

but its not the results that really make me very angry.

but its the ref.

firstly. he gave liverpool the upper hand by giving them lots of free kicks but actually arsenal did nothing wrong.

secondly he gave adabyor a second yellow card. which leads to a red card. when it is sososososo clear that it is jaz a warning.

thirdly, he jaz like slightly less than half of arsenal team yellow cards.

so basically, with adabyor and fab. injured and red carded. arsenal stand very little chance of scoreing.

also. Diaby!!! argh!!! arsen wenger should not have played him. such a inconsistance player.

but eboue came in. he did make a impact. arsenal start createing more chances but i guess. thaere is not much time yet. so. the match end at a fustrating 1-1 draw.

gerald out.

met up with friends today.

2008-12-20T08:22:00.000-08:00

oh man... i met up with my primary friends today. had alot of fun hanging out with each other and we were talking crap lah...

went to watch the yes man. wa... tell its the most how to say. funny show iever watch man. damm funny lah...

ohya... my mum and dad got me a Arsenal away jereasy! man... thanks!!!

gerald out...

song- florida feat. timberland- elevator

i'm here without you.

2008-12-18T00:03:00.000-08:00

i was cleaning my fans that are in my house jaz now.

i thought of many things. reflecting on my life on the pass 1 year. i remember at around this time when my best friend left.

it killed me. scar my heart. deeply. everyday. i look for anyone to lean and cry on.

it hurts. its like you have a deep cut on your iner arm and you put salt on it.

than if u ask me. wat have been keeping me in church?

frankly speaking for the pass 3-4 months i have no idea. really.

but i remember during may. when i had a crush on this girl. than slowly this crush turn into love.

really, this love have been keeping me there. only her.

but. as i stop and look around. i relise that i'm liveing in a whole new world. the old is mostly gone . a lot of new came.

as we grow. we really drift apart. we are no longer as tight or as close as each other any more.

it breaks my heart to see one by one people going.

and these question came to me. why is these happening? why?

you say. to have spirtual scars is part and partual or our walk. but. wat if you cant handle the pain.

church. a place where alot of memories i had. good and bad.

if there any chance for me to be back?

ya...

how? meet me up on sunday night is one.
the other is. when my best friend come back is the time i will be back.

but really. its not easy. i know. the normal method. get into the person world. call him and talk to him. meet up with him. sent him cards. etc.

i know! been a ptl once.

i was reading the bible yesterday night. i came pass these verse. proverbs 20 verse 6.
it says. many a man claims to have unfailing love. but a faithful man who can find?

a question i wanna ask u guys is this.

song- nickleback- gotta be somebody.
3 doors down- here without you.

ok...

2008-12-15T07:36:00.000-08:00

i have no idea wat to out at the title. but ya...

oh... i woek up this morning receiveing a call from my dad. asking me to meet him at imm to have breakfast. my dad today off. =)

ohya.. so woke up. prepare myself. walk to imm. to meet mum and dad.

after breakfast. we went to collect dads car from the work shop. damm... the whole thing cause him like 372 bucks lah... hope that i can open a work shop so that i can service his car for free.

anyways, after that we went to my mum friend house to collect some stuffs. went back home at around 3 plus 4.

ohya... my mum said that during fab next year. there is a chace that we will go back to philippines. yea... if that is how u spell the country name lah...

i cant wat. but must see my results first. if i can go to poly anot. yea...

anyways, i cant wait! why? i might be going overseas this thursday. with my two old buddies. tresha and angel. its been quite a while since we hang out.

i was thinking that i go there and by the arsenal away jersey. might be cheaper.

cant wait. =)

yesterday

2008-12-14T05:48:00.000-08:00

yesterday i went to afcto watch the match. i met jay and his brother ace. cool name right? ace.

ohya so wat happen is. i ordered wedges and beer. and it is like 24 bucj when i have only 20. likely jay was there so he lend me 5 bucks first.thanks jay will return u next sunday.

so wat happen is we draw the game. but is ok... the atmo there is still good.

ohya... i also got to know that kelvin got free tics to the london match nest week. and its the arsenal vs liverpool match. wa! he super lucky lah...

anyways, congrats kelvin. cant wait. for the match next week!!

oh.. i did not go to church today...

i really hope to leave.

song- witness- bo bice

sleepless night

2008-12-12T21:50:00.000-08:00

i did not sleep well yesterday night. i toss and turn around my bed. restless.

but out of no where. my heart felt cold. felt like it died. felt that it turn numb.

than i thought of richard. my best friend. the person closes to my heart other than my parents.

i thought of him. suddenly my heart pains. but who do i turn to?

i sat up. turn on my tv. hopeing for someone to tap me on my shoulder. hopeing someone will wisper to my ear. its ok... he will be back.

tears started to flow down my cheeks.

as i clean my tears away. i look up. hopeing He will speak.

but the hope slowly fade away.

i thought to myself. why go to the place where u long to leave?

true. i got nothing to lose there. but issit?

if i leave. turn my back against the place i once felt so free. i will leave her too.

she's the sole reason why i am staying. ya...

but if... there is one bit that i will leave church.

and if u guys really care. u know where to find me.

two places.

home of the Gooners.

and the place where i keep fit.

i thought of leaving yesterday night. i even thought of wat to say to yassy. and wat she will say to me.

but as i thought through. i think about her. its always her.

its will always be you...

q and a

2008-12-12T07:46:00.000-08:00

1.wishing- are u refering to present? if yes, i would like a arsenal away jersey.
2.doing after this- hmm? sleep maybe?
3.talking to- no one now man.
4.fetishes-good food, good soccer match,good movies.
5.movies-hmm... iron man.
6.looking forward to- the great match next week.
7.last thing i ate- sea food soup with rice.
8.something u are afraid of- u rejecting me.
9.some favourite food-pasta, jap food, CURRY FISH HEAD.
10.something or someone u miss right now- her...

in the last 24 hours.
11.cried- no
12.bought something- food lor...
13.sang- light on by david cook.
14.eaten- food.
15.been kissed- nope
16.felt stupid- no. duh...
17.wanted to tell someone u love them- ya...
18.talk to an ex-nope
19.talked to someone u have a crush one- ya...
20.missed someone- ya...

do you.
21. enjoy company- yes!
22.believe in first sight- i do. always.
23.enjoy soccer- duh! those who dont no life sia...
24.love someone- yes...

personal
25.your role models- my dad and my mum.
26.cried over the oppsite sex- almost.
27.deep screat- don tell u.
28.the most ps thing that ever happen to u- don tell u.
29.ever felt angry in the pass month- ya...

hope to
30.leave any place- ya.. that place.
31.hug somebody- no.
32.punch someone-hope to. but cant.
33.do my dad proud-of course. have always wanna do him proud.

others.
34.felt lonely before- ya... felt it for 1 year already.
35.have any best friend-ya... jw, matthew.
36.the last message that confort u- 2 weeks ago by my blood sister. tell me to get well soon.
37. felt love by friends- nah... the last time i felt that is when i was in secondary school.
38.hope for anything- i hope that i can turn back time.
39.felt love by family- ya... of course. my parents and sisters rock.

sianzzz

2008-12-10T06:26:00.000-08:00

well, as usual. i spent most of my time at home today.

went to the gym today. wanting to start my ruotine all over again. so, wat happen was. ya i was doing my usual stuffs. say, lad roll, press behind back, arm crul, etc... startof small today. cant really do much on my legs today because i have only jaz rocovered or in the process of recovering fully due to an excerise strain. or u can say injuries.

basically, it feels good to hit the gym again. even if its for a short while of jaz about 45 mins. well, i have slim down since i have started gym really proud of myself.

ohya, i had a dream yesterday night. its kind of funny. cant really say it right now.

oh... as i was walking back from the mrt from jurong back home. suddenly, alot of things kept running pass through my mind. things that are close to me. close to my heart.

u know, wat if u wanna do somethings that are extraordinary. somethings that poeple deem impossible.

u know. if u ask me. hey! dude, do u miss your life back than before you are in church?

well, firstly, as most people will say. of course not?! i love my life now.

but for me. back than there are some good and bads in my life. now too. there are good and bads.
good things about being back in secondary school? friends. friends that are soso solid that they are so willing to lay their lives for you. how do i know? experence.

bad about my life before church? i was not as close to my parents and my sisters as now. i value friends more than my parents back than. but now no lah...

good things being in church now? your life change for the better.

bad things? ok. let me ask you people. if you are in a situation that involve you ending up dead will u do it? as in you dieing for your best friend? as in now? i bet not.

back than, we made a vow to each other. that wat ever things that come. we will stay together.
i remember the things we said to each other. the things we do. are jaz so carzy.

that is why sometimes i get so happy and excited when we old friends meet up and do our carzy stuffs together. the fun.

i'm not saying that church life is borring or wat. but if u ask me now. where will i be now teo to three years back. i will say, i'm partying away with friends.

thinking back, i really miss you guys. wei jie, yu sheng, joshua, matthew, ziyi, nizam, michelle, jiang bao.

i really hope that i can meet up with u guys one day soon.

???

2008-12-09T07:14:00.000-08:00

ohya... i was talking to my uncle yesterday about signing on to the police. talk to him for about 15 mins.

well wat he told me is. go futher my studies first weather is higher nitec or poly. than can sign on. because my qulifications are important too.

there are lots of vocations for me to sign on to. but i list down to two main vocations. the star team or cid.

these two vocations i really wanna go. one of them is you got to use alot of your mind. the other is alot of your physical.

which one? i guess only time will tell.

hmm?

2008-12-08T08:00:00.000-08:00

i jaz came back from my cousin wedding dinner. wa.. eat untill very full sia...

but the funny thing is. couple of my cusin and my aunts keep asking me. hey! when is you turn to get married.

my answer is. in an other about 7 years.

well they encourage me to go and look for a girlfriend. well, people say that the more i grow up the more good looking i get.

haha... thanks anyway.

well looking for a gf is actually quite easy. but looking for one whom u can count on is diffecult.
well that is why, u should only aim for one. and when its is the right time than go for it.

but hey! lets not talk about that any more.

lets talk about the coolest sport in the world! soccer!!!

i jaz read arsenal.com. they said that ros is going to be out till like next year march. wa! super long right. looks like arsenal is going to miss him till march.

get well soon ros! we need you in the team.

cant wait for the time when arsenal will vs liverpool. well i have faith that arsenal will win liverpool.

cant wait!! haha...

gtg. kind of tired.

wat does it takes to fall in love?

2008-12-07T09:04:00.000-08:00

i went to church today. i was talking to one of my good friend. she was saying that she heard a person saying. her that if a particular person likes you from our group. and if you know there is no hope to further the relationship. tell the person that. its better to be pain now than when its even deeper and you pain even more.

at first i did not really think of wat she said.

but when is was coming home jaz now alone. walking. i suddenly thought of wat she said. it strike me. wat if? she say that to me? i seriously dunno wat i will do.

but before that i ask myself. wat does it take to fall in love? seriously i have no idea. a heart maybe? a soul?

why? the person whom i like or love. in return do not like me. haiz... joshua. i know how u feel right now.

look people i'm not trying to get anything here. i'm not trying to get attention or something.

but i jaz wanna show or at least try to allow you to know wat i have been. i'm not really good at words though.

well back to the topic. i was thinking. well if she likes someone else. and the person happen to be my very good friend. wa... i have no idea wat to do. i think many things will start crushing down man. i thought it over. i think i will leave church man. why? because i really dunno how to face her and my good friend. it will be very akward man. seriously.

frankly speaking, a part of me is dead and in the ground. also these love is killing me but i know you are the only one.

a question, do you catch a breath when i look at you? or are you holding back?

haiz... someone ask me. am i crazy or jaz falling in love?

the answer, i have fallen in love. deeply.

as i was walking back. i look up into the night sky. and saw stars. and i am hopeing for something special to happen. something extaondinary. something that will make us happy ever after.

haiz...

well done Gunners

2008-12-06T09:11:00.000-08:00

well i jaz finish watching the Arsenal match against wegen. the won 1-0. well done Gunners.

but anyways, i have receive questions from my friends whom they do not watch soccer. they ask. hey, wats so nice about soccer? its like 18 people chaseing a ball.

than i will tell them. its like how u are so passionate about your sport. weather is rugby, swimming, batminton, bball. etc. its the same reason u see.

than they will say, but its very borring sitting down at watching them running for the ball.

than i will say. its the trill and the joy of them scoreing the goal. (them which is Arsenal).

than after saying that. they will jaz keep quiet and change subject.

but for all people who are not interested in soccer. try going to on of the big matches one day with your friend. to the fc. i am sure it will blow your mind. that is why my sister now is also so interested in soccer.

gerald out. =)

ns?

2008-12-05T09:59:00.000-08:00

i was reading alvin's blog when he talk about his time in ocs.

so something strike me. something that say. will police ever allow me to learn wat he learn?

frankly speaking, i'm always am open to people or myself to sign on to the military life. but for me? i was on in the mrt today and thought about wat i really wan to be. to be in the police or in the army or the air force?

i thought about it. deeply. thinking to myself in the mids of all the noise.

frankly, i really wan to be jaz like my dad. the way he lead his man. the family. his thinking.

there is so much i had to learn from him.

i thought of competeing my higher nitec and ns. than go for my dipolma. sign on to the airforce. than while working go for my degree.

but i also thought of wat my parents will say.

i know they want the best for me. they are afraid that my co will not be a good one.

but for me. having a good or bad co does not really makes much of a difference.

well having a good one of course have its advantage. but if you do your job properly you will not have any thing that is going to happen to you wat.agree?

well, still thinking of it.

gtg! God bless you people.=)

me!

2008-12-04T02:57:00.000-08:00

people change. they do. maybe they are sick and tired of doing it other peoples way.

ya. thats me. from today onward. i'm staying strong to wat i say. one time and thats it.

song listening now- simple plan generation.
david archileta, crush

CRUSH
I hung up the phone tonight,
something happened for the first time, deep inside
It was a rush, what a rush
Cause the possibility that you would ever
Feel the same way about me
It’s just too much, just too much
Why do I keep running from the truth
All I ever think about is you
You got me hypnotized, so mesmerized, and I just got to know

Do you ever think, when you’re all alone
All that we could be, Where this thing could go
Am I crazy or falling in love
Is it real or just another Crush
Do you catch a breath, when I look at you
Are you holding back, like the way I do
Cause I’m trying, trying to walk away
But I know this crush ain’t goin away, goin away

Has it ever crossed your mind when we were hanging
Spending time girl, are we just friends
Is there more, is there more
See it’s a chance we’ve gotta take
Cause I believe we can make this into
Something that will last, last forever, forever
[ Crush lyrics from http://www.lyricsyoulove.com/ ]

Do you ever think, when you’re all alone
All that we could be, Where this thing could go
Am I crazy or falling in love
Is it real or just another crush
Do you catch a breath, when I look at you
Are you holding back, like the way I do
Cause I’m trying, trying to walk away
But I know this crush ain’t goin away, goin away

Why do I keep running from the truth
All I ever think about is you
You got me hypnotized, so mesmerized
And I just got to know

Do you ever think, when you’re all alone
All that we could be, Where this thing could go
Am I crazy or falling in love
Is it realor just another crush
Do you catch a breath, when I look at you
Are you holding back, like the way I do
Cause I’m trying, trying to walk away
But I know this crush ain’t goin away, goin away
(Thanks to amii_jb93 for these lyrics)

ARSENAL!!!

2008-12-01T07:13:00.000-08:00

ARSENAL WON!! the two goals are from R.V.P. two sensational goal. it was super cool lah..

the gunners really did the gooners proud man. =)

song-david cook- light on

Never really said too much
Afraid it wouldn’t be enough
Just try to keep my spirits up
When there’s no point in grieving
Doesn’t matter anyway
Words could never make me stay
Words will never take my place
When you know I’m leaving

(Chorus)
Try to leave a light on when I’m gone
Something I rely on to get home
One I can feel at night
A naked light, a fire to keep me warm
Try to leave a light on when I’m gone
Even in the daylight, shine on
And when it’s late at night you can look inside
You won’t feel so alone

You know we’ve been down that road
What seems a thousand times before
My back to a closing door and my eyes to the seasons
That roll out underneath my heels
And you don’t know how bad it feels
To leave the only one that I have ever believed in

[Chorus]

Sometimes it feels like we’ve run out of luck
When the signal keeps on breaking up
When the wires cross in my brain
You’ll start my heart again
When I come along

[Chorus]

blah!

2008-11-25T01:41:00.000-08:00

i got this from henry's blog again. haha. but did i add something too.

Would you date someone good looking with alot of friends or good looking but not as many friends?
Either One is Fine, as long as She is the Right one :D

Are you keeping a big secret right now?
yea! of course

If you had a baby with the last person you texted?
That would be kinda Awkards...

Do you still talk to the person you fell hardest for?
that's a lame question. of course!!!

Do you prefer to take showers at night or in the morning?
both! i shower in the morning and at night.

Do you always answer your phone?
erm... no

Are you good at math?
ok lah... but if u ask me about chinese. hell no man

How did your day go yesterday?
school

Have you ever liked someone who had a boyfriend/girlfriend?
nope

Does the future scare you?
i know wat i want. so i don have to worry.

Was it a boy or a girl to call you last?
guy. my dad called me to eat.

Do you prefer regular or chocolate milk?
which duck don like milk. i love milk like how i love durian.

When was the last time you had starbucks?
dunno man.

Do you sleep on your stomach?
how?!

Who was the last person that made you cry?
i don remember

Do you crack your knuckles?
Yes! And I think I can Make music with them!

What are your favorite color(s)?
red, black, grey, yellow and blue

Ever been on a blind date?
never!!!

Are you named after anyone?
no way man

What is on your bed right now?
My Blanket, Pillow

Where were you doing last night at midnight?
sleeping!

Where is your Brother right now?
i dont have a brother

Anything you're giving up on?
Yeah, But kind of Personal to Share :)

Who was the last person you gave your number to?
i don remember

Have you lost friends in the past year?
Yeah, i still miss my best friend

Who's the last person that made you smile?
i have not really smile truefully for a very long time.

Who do you tell everything to?
God

Looking back, did you ever waste too much time on a certain boy or girl?
yea man

Where is your phone?
beside me.

How many people do you love?
only a handful of people

Whats his/her name?
God,mum, dad and my family

When was the last time you went to the mall?
i've been sick lately. so i am damm lazy to go to imm.

Are you doing anything good today?
i think so.

Is there anyone on your mind?
of course!!!

Do you believe what comes around goes around?
yup.

Have you ever cried from being so mad?
nope

Did you cry today?
no

Who was the last person you yelled at?
i forgot

What windows are open on your computer?
com got windows one meh?

In the past week have you gotten sick?
yup.

Who was your last call from?
my dad.

Are you someone who worries too often?
nope

Do you think someone is thinking about you right now?
of course!!!

How late did you stay up last night and why?
12.30

Honestly, if you could go back 1 month and change something would you?
neh. wats over is over

Is there anyone who doesn't like you?
But of Course! but i try to make friends with them.

Is there anybody you wish you could be spending time with right now?
Yes! But can't say!

Do you know what you're wearing tomorrow?
Yes! my uniform.

What do you currently hear right now?
my family talking.

Where did you get the shirt you are wearing?
my school

Do you know anyone that smokes weed?
ya

How long does it take you to shower?
depends if i am in the rush. but normally 15 mins.

What was last thing you drank?
water

How has the week been?
bad

Do you curse in front of your parents?
no

Has anyone disappointed you lately
Yes!

Has anyone make u feel loved lately?
ya... my mum and dad. only they understands me.

who sms/msn u when u fell sick?
firstly, the first person was my parents. than my ah ma. than my sisters.

wat where you doing at 3 o'clock?
is was in school playing cards.

how many real/solid friends do you have?
2 actually. shocking right?

well

2008-11-21T07:18:00.002-08:00

i'm kind of tired right now. really wanna go sleep already man. my body is like tuneing to the holiday mood already.

but anyways, i went to queensway with cai today. we took 51 there. it took us quite some time to find where is the bus stop cause we don really know where is it. anyways, during the first like one qurtar of the trip. we were like talking about our lifes and stuffs.

than after that we were damm board about the whole journey that we started talking lame things. but soon grew tired and we went to the stoneing stage.

well soon. we reach queensway and we went to shop for cai jacket. ohya, wanted to meet up later in the evening to video him and his friends danceing hip hop. but his friends say they very ps. haha...

anyways, we walk around and we came to the first shop that sell jacket with hood. so we look around. and the auntie keep pasykoing us to buy. but we manage to sneek out. so we walk and walk. than finally we saw a nice black jacket. so cai bought it.

than we went looking for shoes. for me. haha... its nice. which is only like 19.90 only. so ya i bought it.

than after we make our way to the mrt. went home. during the trip my goodness.if anyone of u were there. i think u will rate us the world lames guys on the face of this earth. we were basically crapping and crapping the whole entire journey back to home.

well i can see that i am getting it to his life right now. so time will tell if he will get save.

anyways, if u are at home. jaz resting your body from the week. u will tend to think alot. for those who likes to think. well think about wat?

lots of things! both positive and negetive. u know all the wat if this. wat if that. how to solve this how to solve that. wat am i gonna say if i reach this stage of my life. this and that.

wa... i tell u man. alot of things kept flooding my mind jaz now when cai and i were in the bus stoneing. well ya we were stoneing. but my mind is still thinking.

well, i jaz wanna say.

-it comes with a price todo something great or become someone great.
-but it comes with a heavier price if u do nothing at all.

-it takes 1 hour and alittle of your effort to encourage someone who is close to leaving.
-but it takes 2 months and alot of effort to try to bring back someone who have left.

-it takes 1 message to bring a person down.
-but it takes 3 words to encourage and make the person feel love.

-it takes a moody and angry face to darken your day.
-but it takes a smile to brighten up your day.

-it takes a person full of pride and selfishness not to serve people who are in equal states
then them
-but it takes a humble person to serve not only serve people who are above states than them
but also equal states than them. not forgeting people who are below states than them.

well that is basically all. think about this. gtg.

well

2008-11-21T07:18:00.001-08:00

argh!! 6 weeks!!!

2008-11-17T07:25:00.000-08:00

well i jaz came back from the movies. went to watch madgescar 2 with sis. it was funny man.

well, i also got to know from my 2nd sis that i cant do strainous sports for the next 6 weeks! my jaw drop when i heard that. (fyi, my sis is a nurse)

i was like u serious? she's like ya... but she told me to rest for this week. next week onwards start small with my excersice routine.

than i was like heng ah... at least i can train on my upper body. cant stress on my leg.

so i think, no soccer and bball for this week and next week.

well that is ok with me. with no soccer and bball for the next 2 weeks.

well gtg. see ya! =)

well done people

2008-11-16T08:42:00.000-08:00

well i jaz reach home not long ago.

jaz wanna say congrats to those who won the $150 adidas price money. jo and gang.

so proud of u guys.

well, i really wanna join them for soccer. but i cant. got injured. i think if it gets worse of something i have to badage my feet or something. but now not lah...

anyways, 2 more weeks! includeing these week! i cant wait for school to end. yes!!! i can smell freedom. i can almost feel it. i can smell it!!! jaz alittle bit more.

currently prpareing on wat to say for todays prsentation.

gtg anyways. bb. =)

follow up

2008-11-11T14:37:00.000-08:00

follow up on saturday match.

well i cant stop thinking that we have finally beaten man utd.

i am so proud of the young gunners. well this morning match aginst wigan. we won 3-0. yea!

cool stuff. well its 6.35 in the morning. getting ready to get to school. i jaz cant wait for holidays to come man.

also, i have no idea if i wanna go and study first or go to ns first man. argh!cant make up my mind.

gerald out.

ARSENAL!!!

2008-11-08T08:16:00.000-08:00

YEA!!! Arsenal won man utd.

it was super cool lah...when arsenal score the first goal. we were already very happy.

than we can see that at the point of time. man utd was very angry. so they cant play well.

but during the second half. they improve alittle. but not enough. so wat happen is Narsi score his second goal in the match.

wow i tell u. we were basically screaming out lungs out when he score the second goal man.

but i can tell u. the reff is very ca long one lah..(short form of sideing the other team).

when Narsi wanted to score already. one man utd pull his tee in the penlty box. and that is so clearly a free kick. but he did not give.

well basically i am soso very happy that arsenal won.

6am blogging?

2008-11-06T14:14:00.000-08:00

well its now 6 plus am in a friday morning. wait. did u mention friday? yes i did. yes!!! finally its friday!

finally i can enjoy the weekend again man. i cant wait.

anyways, i cant wait for tml! why? because tml i will be going for pst kong service. it will be an super cool service lah...

also i cant wait for tml match between arsenal and man utd.

my prediction. 2-1 in the favour of arsenal. well tml i will be meeting jem han to watch the match together. i think the place tml will be jam pack man.

cant wait!!!

arsenal fc!!!

anyways, gtg. see ya... =)

cool stuff

2008-11-05T07:50:00.000-08:00

well jaz reach home not long ago.

i came from church. and dude the service was great man.

ok. the trip back was mad. i took the cab home. i think the uncle dreams to drive a sports car or something.

u know wat speed is he going anot? average 100kmph and above. i remember him driveing at 150kmph. i was like. no! i don wanna die!

well as i said God hands are on me. haha. cool right.

anyways, back home blogging going to sleep now. bye! =)

higher.

2008-11-02T06:01:00.001-08:00

well. yesterday service was cool.

God spoke.

i ask Him.

me-God can u take me higher?

God- gerald, I can take u even higher. more than wat u or other people can think of.

God-go, take up mma. go, if you wan to sign on to police. i will rise you up that people will not expect you to go.

i was blown away. now i know why God ask me to go take up mma. i finally know why.

gtg. see ya

song listening now- watch over you- alterbridge

sianzzzzz

2008-11-01T11:18:00.000-07:00

jaz came back from a.f.c. well arsenal lost to stoke man. argh!!!!!!!!!!!!! i cant believe it man.

today they play very bad man.

sianz

gtg

mad

2008-10-31T04:12:00.000-07:00

i think i carzy. why? well today. after school end at 10.30am. haha so good right.

anyways, at 11. i went to the gym with sala. school gym.

than after that at 12. we end and i went to sc to hang out. than at 5 plus i went down to the gym at clmanti. i'm like quit tired right now man. serious.

anyways, today is jie birthday. happy birthday jie. =)

total lol

2008-10-30T07:15:00.000-07:00

we were in class today. and we have totally nothing to do.

so we came up with this super lame idea of takeing a video. well its a very short clip.

its damm funny. who ever wanna watch. let me know.

hehe. =)

when nights were clear. you were to first star i ever see

2008-10-28T07:37:00.000-07:00

the title says it all. i am willing to do anything for you. really. take up something that i don really wanna take.

i love you. thats wat i got to say to you. you are my strength.

the rest of my problems are over when i see you.

tired

2008-10-25T09:27:00.001-07:00

i'm tired. wanna sleep man. seriously.

anyways, today service was good man. learn alot of things.

God spoke to me. its awhile since i hear His voice. how i miss His voice.

well He told me. go take up mma. come on. for me?

when He told me that. in the gentle voice. oh... my heart melt. that voice with such love. i cant help but i cried.

how do i know is Him? i jaz know. i jaz know.

anyways, gtg. see ya.

song listening now- used to- chris daughtry

really, i'm alright

2008-10-24T18:07:00.000-07:00

well i jaz wanna say its finally the weekend already!

monday is a holiday. yea!

this song i am listening now. is sent by henry. is this chinese song. should go get it from him. cause it really express my feelings man. serious.

lame!

2008-10-23T06:02:00.000-07:00

erm. today school is madness!

well we jaz finish project. ya...

was talking to cai. he's lame!!!

well this is wat we said.

me-cai!! can u help me to remove the drill while i clean up the place?
cai- u watch out!
me-shut up. man
cai-ya
me-jaz take out the drill man.
cai-i hate you.
me-thanks.
cai-i cant take the drill out.
me-wait let me try.
me-wa! really cannot take out.
cai-ya.(clapping his hands to show his lameness)
me-let me try again.(after awhile) finally!
cai-see, its all me. that shows how strong am i.
for me. i jaz walk off without saying aword.
but after awhile.
me-cai! u are one lame guy.
cai- thanks. than showing his lame clap again.

ohya.. today cai and gab said something stupid.

cai- i got a drgree in road sweeping.
gab-wat dregree?
cai-road sweeping lah... are u deaf?
gab-ya... wat degree are u? (as in tempreture)

wa the way they talk ah. make me laugh till i roll on the floor man.

anyways, gtg. bb

i hate school!

2008-10-22T07:48:00.000-07:00

well, i hate school. really. i know hate is a big word. but i really hate school.

why? firstly, because of the people there. it sucks.

secondly, is about tml and friday. well every thursday i suppost to start school at 11pm. well i don intend to go to school tml for the 11 oclock class. but guess wat? i have to go to school tml at 8am!. argh!!! my sleep is being disturp. damm lah...

well, as for friday, i suppost to start school at 9. but now it starts at 8!.

argh!!! its driving me nuts! i wanna fast forward time to the day i finish school.

anyways, aside all the anger. i met up with fong to. played bowling with him. well we make friends with a couple of pros. whom one of them teach us bowling. well he gave us his no. his name is henry too. haha...

also, i wanna say i miss you. really, i jaz wanna look at you. and stare into your eyes forever. really. i love you.

gtg now. =)

song listening now. witness-bo bice

hmm?

2008-10-15T07:44:00.000-07:00

firstly, i jaz wanna say thanks for those who sms me for my birthday.

and, i got a latter from mindef. that i jaz got in to not army but police. ya police.

so my dad said he does not mind me signing on to police. so i wanna go to the nicotics side. where to catch people who deals with drugs. ya. and i don have to wear uniform man. cool right.

anyways, everything i do. i jaz wanna do my dad proud. i never going to think back.

ya... so that is all man. bye

song listening now-chris daughtry- home

dude!!!

2008-10-14T06:12:00.000-07:00

well i copy this at henrysblog so ya...

Starting time:
9.12

Name:
GERALD CHAN YANQING

Shoe size:
7

Height:

164CM

Where do you live in:

Singapore.

Favourite drinks:

ICE MILO

Favourite breakfast:
MACS BIGBREAKFAST

Have you ever been on a plane:
DUDE! YA!

Swam in the ocean:
YUP . OF COURSE. LOTS OF TIME

Fallen asleep at school:
OF COURSE. U KNOW ME

Broken someone's heart:
YA. BUT WE ARE STILL FRIENDS.

Fell off your chair:
MY CHAIR GOT PULLED OFF FROM ME. SLY!!! I STILL REMEMBER. YA.

Sat by the phone all night waiting for someone to call:

YA. ALWAYS WAITING. THIS IS WAT I WILL DO FOREVER FOR HER

Saved e-mails:
I DUNNO MAN.

What is your room like:

MESSY ALL BECAUSE OF MY SIS.

What's right beside you:
MY HP

What is the last thing you ate:
I FORGOT. LOL

Ever had chicken pox:
YEA

Stitches:
I FORGOT TOO.LOL

Broken nose:
NOPE. BUT ALMOST BROKE ONE OF MY EX-CLASSMATE NOSE.

Do you believe in love at first sight:

OF COURSE! THIS IS HOW MY PARENTS GOT MARRIED.

Like picnics:
Yeah, I love Picnics.

Who was/were the last person/people you danced with:

MY MUM. SHE ASK ME TO DANCE WITH HER

Last made you smile:

HER

You last yelled at:

I DON REMEMBER

Today did you
Talk to someone you like:
NOPE

Kiss anyone:

Get sick:
WHO WILL NOT GET SICK?

Talk to an ex:
EH... NOPE

Miss someone:

YUP ACTUALLY RIGHT NOW.

Eat:
Yes! I ATE BREAKFAST, LUNCH, DINNER

Best feeling in the world:
LOVING SOMEONE

Who do you really hate:
SERIOUSLY, PEOPLE BULLYING SOMEONE WHO ARE SMALLER SIZE THAN HIM. HENRY KNOWS WHO I AM TALKING ABOUT

What time is it now? : 9.22

Random
Is there a person who is on your mind now:
YUP

Do you have any siblings:
Yes!

Do you want children:
NOW! MAD!

Do you smile often:
OF COURSE!

Do you like your hand-writing:
I DO

Are your toe nails painted:
NEVER!

Whose bed other than yours would you rather sleep in:
MY PARENTS. DUDE ITS SO GOOD MAN.

What color shirt are you wearing now:
RED

What were you doing at 7:00 p.m. yesterday:
NOTHING

I can't wait till:
I GET ACCEPTED INTO ARMY. AS A REGULAR

ARMY!

GETTING MARRIED.

MY FIRST CHILD

Are you a friendly person:

ER! YA!

Do you have any pets:
YUP. AND I JAZ TOOK HIM FOR A WALK JAZ NOW.

Where is the person you have feelings for right now?:
NO IDEA

Did the last person you held hands with mean anything to you now?:
OF COURSE MAN! THAT IS WHY WE WERE HOLDING HANDS. BUT NOW. NO

Do you sleep with the TV on?:

YA LOTS OF TIMES. WHEN I AM SO TIRED

What are you doing right now?:
Doing the Quiz :) AND ABOUT TO STONE

Have you ever crawled through a window?:
I DON REMEMBER

Can you handle the truth?:

YUP OF COURSE . IT WILL BE DAMM SAD TO BE IN THE DARK

Are you too forgiving?:

SOMETIMES

Are you closer to your mother or father?:
MUM

Who was the last person you cried in front of?:
ER! CAN I DON ANSWER THIS QUESTION?

How many people can you say you've really loved?:
7

Do you eat healthy:
YUP

Do you still have pictures of you & your ex?:
YA

Have you ever cried because of something someone said to you:
ONCE . THAT TIME WAS HEART BREAKING

If you're having a bad day, who are you most likely to go to?:

GOD. MY PARENTS AND MY LEADERS

Are you loud or quiet most of the time?:

CAN BE BOTH

Are you confident?:
YA. ALWAYS

5 things I was doing 10 years ago:
I REALLY DON REMEMBER.

5 things on my to-do list today:
ER! NOW IS 9.31PM. WAT CAN I DO?

5 snacks I enjoy:
LOTS MAN

what would you do if you were a billionaire:
HAHA. THE BIG WORD IS IF

5 of my bad habits:
1. TALKING CRAP(WAIT IS THAT EVEN ONE?)
2. LAZY LOR
.CAN SOMEONE TELL ME THE REST?

5 places I have/will lived in:

TOH GUAN. ALWAYS!

5 jobs I've had:
THERE IS ONLY ONE JOB THAT I WILL TAKE ON. WHICH IS BEING IN AI

cow!

2008-10-13T03:53:00.000-07:00

well i jaz came back from ps and cmpb.

well firstly, i went for the interview today to take up the ite scorlaship. well my mum came with me. well, the captain told me to go and further my studies first. like go into higher nitec or poly. than i go take up the scorloship. well it is because i will have better prospect.

wat he say is true. so i will go and futher my studies first before signing on.

than, i went home first with mum. than after about 15 mins. i change and went to meet jw. did not go to school today. well he too.

well, tml school starts at 8.30am. damm sianzz.

gtg already. see ya...

dude!!!

2008-10-12T07:31:00.000-07:00

i dunno how to say this. but i am having mix emotions about school start tml. although i don have to go to school tml. but ya... erm... i am kind of happy and sianz at the same time.

why happy? because i don have to spent my time rotting at home.

why sianz? because i have to wake up at 5.30 again everyday if my class start at 8. soya...

but anyways, i am having my interview tml already. kind of looking forward to it.

also, i jaz wanna say thanks to C1 and C3 for the present and the card for me birthday. i really like it man. thanks!!! =)

i finally know who my real friends are. people who remember things about you. your birthday. and stuffs.

well, i guess i am all pump up again. =)

well gtg already. will update tml. see ya boys and girls. =)

song listening now-do i make you proud-taylor hicks.(this song is for my dad. I Love You Dad)

saving me

2008-10-11T09:22:00.000-07:00

show me wats is like. because i really don know how.

Saving me.

Prison gates won't open up for me
On these hands and knees I'm crawlin'
Oh, I reach for you
Well I'm terrified of these four walls
These iron bars can't hold my soul in
All I need is you
Come please I'm callin'
And oh I scream for you
Hurry I'm fallin', I'm fallin'

[Chorus:]
Show me what it's like
To be the last one standing
And teach me wrong from right
And I'll show you what I can be
Say it for me
Say it to me
And I'll leave this life behind me
Say it if it's worth saving me

Heaven's gates won't open up for me
With these broken wings I'm fallin'
And all I see is you
These city walls ain't got no love for me
I'm on the ledge of the eighteenth story
And oh I scream for you
Come please I'm callin'
And all I need from you
Hurry I'm fallin', I'm fallin'

[Chorus]

Hurry I'm fallin'

All I need is you
Come please I'm callin'
And oh, I scream for you
Hurry I'm fallin', I'm fallin', I'm fallin'

[Chorus]

Hurry I'm fallin'

tired

2008-10-10T09:59:00.000-07:00

i'm tired. right now. really. both outside and the inside.

today, went to pitstop with some of the guys.

i really dunno how to out in words how i feel for her. really.

i really dunno wat to say right now. my mind is jaz full of her.

i love you. really.

higher.

2008-10-07T07:36:00.000-07:00

well have been rotting at home these pass two days. this song that is coming up really sings my emotions.

HIGHER

When dreaming I'm guided to another world
Time and time again
At sunrise I fight to stay asleep
'Cause I don't want to leave the comfort of this place
'Cause there's a hunger, a longing to escape
From the life I live when I'm awake
So let's go there
Let's make our escape
Come on, let's go there
Let's ask can we stay?

Can you take me Higher?
To a place where blind men see
Can you take me Higher?
To a place with golden streets

Although I would like our world to change
It helps me to appreciate
Those nights and those dreams
But, my friend, I'd sacrifice all those nights
If I could make the Earth and my dreams the same
The only difference is
To let love replace all our hate
So let's go there
Let's make our escape
Come on, let's go there
Let's ask can we stay?

Can you take me Higher?
To a place where blind men see
Can you take me Higher?
To a place with golden streets

So lets go there, lets go there,
Come on, lets go there
Lets ask can we stay?

Up high I feel like I'm alive for the very first time
Set up high I'm strong enough to take these dreams
And make them mine
Set up high I'm strong enough to take these dreams
And make them mine

Can you take me Higher?
To a place where blind men see
Can you take me Higher?
To a place with golden streets

Can you take me Higher?
To a place where blind men see
Can you take me Higher?
To a place with golden streets

why?!!

2008-10-04T09:06:00.000-07:00

why?!!

arsenal! argh! they draw against sunderland. my goodness. i think the midfielders must be (ke long) one lah... wa cow. they have lost 2 match in a row already lah...

my goodness.

can they win the next epl game against everton on oct 18? well that is i think entirely up to the midfelders lah..

beacause the midfelders currently is kind of weak. well there is, eboue, fab, denilson and walcott. well with these midfelders not injured and playing. only two are strong on midfeld and that is walcott and fab. the rest are really not good. seriously. althought i am a arsenal fan but i cant say no to that. right?.

haiz, really hope rosicky get back asap man. if he get fit soon. than arsenal will again own epl again. with strong strikers like bentender, adebayor, van persie, vela. than midfelders like nasri, rossicky, fab and walcott on midfeld we will own man.

get well soon rosicky! your team needs u. badly.

oh my goodness

2008-10-03T07:54:00.000-07:00

my goodness! my interview is on the oct 13. and my goodness. i don have my nafa test!!

but wat worse is that is that when i go to the toh payo. but i am worrying is that i cant even do a damm pull up!! argh!!! the rest is ok. wat matters is my pull up.

anyways, i jaz got to know that jw results for his exam. man. he only get like gpa 1 only lah. i was very shock lah... than he don wanna tell his mum. but i told him. if u don tell your mum. the concequenses is even worse. so better be honest. at least the punishment is not that great. for him lah. because he comes from a very very X 1 million strict family.

so dudes pray for him man. =)

so now listening- What if- Creed

YES!

2008-09-29T17:28:00.000-07:00

wow! i jaz got the latter from the army. that they ask me go interview. yea! finally.

well. i wanna say. i miss you. the look from your eyes. your beatifull eyes. i wish i can look at your eyes forever. i wish i can jaz listen to your voice and your loudness forever. i jaz hope to say i love you. but i know i cant. for now. i love you deeply.

song listening now- when i'm gone. 3 doors down.

hmm

2008-09-25T09:15:00.000-07:00

well i am damm sianz right now lah... after coming back from the chalet. i am like staying at home all the while. wanna go out. wanna ask my cg mates to come. but most of them are having exams or are busy studying for their As or Os. i don wanna disturp them man.

well tried calling jian wei out but he seems to be avoiding me. i have no idea why. maybe is that time when i told him off in the phone. hey! but u cant blame me man. he was too much man. what happen? well basically, he promise me to meet me up but in the end did not come. not once but alot of times.

i know i have did that too. but at that time i was angry man. D was with me too man.

well, i tried calling him jaz now. wanting to say i'm sorry for wat i said to him. well, firstly, his dad answered to say that he was shiting. than second time. his mum answered saying that he is sleeping. well, i really wanna say sorry man. but i cant do it if he keep on avoiding me man.

argh!!! i don wanna lost a bro like him man. damm, maybe i was too over that time. learn my lesson. sorry jian wei!

the song i am listening now- if you're gone. matchbox 20.

sometimes i wonder

2008-09-19T09:10:00.000-07:00

i jaz came to relise that onw of my friend just went into army not long ago.

well, i was thinking that will i ever be miss when i go to the army. i know my blood family will. but what about my friends?

why do only poeplewho are respected well being missed? why not those normal people?

sometimes i really wonder.

recently

2008-09-17T07:15:00.000-07:00

well. have be ok for the pass couple of 2-3 weeks. no illness and stuffs. things have been running smoothly and all.

met up with d today to buy the camping stuffs for next week.
well yes. for u guys who have no idea wat i am talking about. i am going camping with d next week. for about 5 days.

also, i cant wait for ndu to call me up for interview. i really hope they do.

well have been quite tired this few days. dunno why. maybe the holidays are coming up. so my body like auto turn on to holiday mood.

hmm nothing much to say right now. gtg. bb

2008-09-11T07:15:00.000-07:00

INVISIBLE

What are you doing tonight
I wish I could be a fly on your wall
Are you really alone
Still in your dreams
Why can't I bring you into my life
What would it take to make you see that I'm alive

[Chorus ]

If I was invisible
Then I could just watch you in your room
If I was invisible
I'd make you mine tonight
If hearts were unbreakable
Then I can just tell you where I stand
I would be the smartest man
If I was invisible
(Wait..I already am)

I saw your face in the crowd
I called out your name
You don't hear a sound
I keep tracing your steps
Each move that you make
Wish I could be what goes through your mind
Wish you could touch me with the colors of your life

[Chorus ]

If I was invisible
Then I could just watch you in your room
If I was invisible
I'd make you mine tonight
If hearts were unbreakable
Then I can just tell you where I stand
I would be the smartest man
If I was invisible
(Wait..I already am)

I reach out
But you don't even see me
Even when I'm screaming
Baby, you don't hear me
I am nothing without you
Just a shadow passing through...

[ Repeat Chorus ]

if i was invisible. hmm

Jesus, Take The Wheel

2008-09-10T07:06:00.000-07:00

On a snow white Christmas Eve
Going home to see her Mama and her Daddy with the baby in the backseat
Fifty miles to go and she was running low on faith and gasoline
It'd been a long hard year
She had a lot on her mind and she didn't pay attention
she was going way too fast
Before she knew it she was spinning on a thin black sheet of glass
She saw both their lives flash before her eyes
She didn't even have time to cry
She was sooo scared
She threw her hands up in the air

Jesus take the wheel
Take it from my hands
Cause I can't do this on my own
I'm letting go
So give me one more chance
To save me from this road I'm on
Jesus take the wheel

It was still getting colder when she made it to the shoulder
And the car came to a stop
She cried when she saw that baby in the backseat sleeping like a rock
And for the first time in a long time
She bowed her head to pray
She said I'm sorry for the way
I've been living my life
I know I've got to change
So from now on tonight

Jesus take the wheel
Take it from my hands
Cause I can't do this on my own
I'm letting go
So give me one more chance
To save me from this road I'm on

Oh, Jesus take the wheel
Oh, I'm letting go
So give me one more chance
Save me from this road I'm on
From this road I'm on
Jesus take the wheel
Oh, take it, take it from me
Oh, why, oh

God oh my Lord. take my wheel. i cant take it any more.

hiaz

2008-09-04T08:12:00.000-07:00

well. jaz now elijah jaz sent me the pic of me, dom and hirull.

looking at it. it really remind me of how much fun we had last year during our time at sc.

how i wish i can put all the happy moments together and never have the bad moments. everyday will be joyful.

but i know it is impossiable. now as the holidays are closeing in. i feel that i have to spent more time with my family and excerise.

well gtg now. bb.

miss those days.

2008-09-03T07:27:00.000-07:00

i was looking through my file on my personnal documents.

as i was takeing mut my lifesaving certs to prepare. i came across my primary and secondary school pictures.

i first look at my secondary school pics. oh my goodness. that day when we took the picture. i remember it so clearly in my mind and heart. we first took the formal picture. i remember the lady ask me and some of my classmates to ajust our ties. than as usual. we cant keep still. keep moving. (purposely). than my classmate shout. hey! come on lets take the pic and we can take the fun shot.

ok than we took the formal shot. when it came to the fun shot. i remember standing beside matthew for the fun shot. i remember he was pintching my right hand. lol. kind of werid right? than joshua was makeing some stupid face. some of my classmates actually make my form teacher hair.

i remember the noise we make. the fun we had. during our secandory school days.

i remember when i was secandory 1. when me and abu will take 187 everyday to go to jurong west to buy wwe cards to play. at that time it was very comman to play that game.

we will end school at around 1 plus. than will go to there and reach home at about 3-4 plus.

than comes secondary 2. where the real fun begains. we and jiang bao will hang out after school. we will go to the archade with mic.(one of my other classmate). jp and i will sometimes play bb at my house downstairs. go watch movie together.

than goes to secondary 3. where i get closer to matthew,ziyi, joshua,ming hong, aloy,nizam and my ncc best friend yong an.

matthew, joshua,nizam and i really spend time with each other. we will go out watch movie. especally, joshua nizam and i. we are like the best of the best friends.

for ming hong, aloy and yong an. we will have lunch or dinner after school sometimes with the rest i sometimes after ncc training.

than secondary 4. we are even closer even it is the year of n level. the wei jie and yu sheng and hou jet join our group. wa! when those 3 join us. the group is like the best of the best. we go out. make lots and lots of noise. crap with each other. disturp each other. make fun of each other. than wei jie and i everyday go to gym. than after that we will train out fighting skills at a block.

damm... i really really really X like 1 million miss my secondary school. the teachers there. my siraj. mr zu, miss ang, mr peng, mr heng. i miss u guys alot. u all have a place in my heart. also my dm. she is damm cute one lah.. u look at her u wanna laugh but when she is angry she is really angry.

how i wish i can turn back time and enjoy the days i had in secondary school.

now that we all go our separate ways. i only have four words to say.

i miss u guys!

gerald out.

hey

2008-08-17T07:28:00.000-07:00

yoyo! jaz came back from church and jaz bath finish. anyways, yesterday and today i am sick man.

well actually today i don wanna go to church one. for cg and for service. becuase when i woke up. i feel very sian. but wat make me come. is because i am inspired by my very own pastor. as most of u know. he is injured and is having a high fever. and he still wanna go up to stage and share the word of God.

when i thought of that. i felt very inspired and told myself. if pastor can do it so can i.

so i went for cg and service. during the end of the service. i saw pastor standing up. on his feet. i was touch as it takes lots of strength to do that. and it may cause further pain to his wound.

i am very proud of pastor How. he is the man.

anyways, i gtg and sleep lao. see ya.

the way

2008-08-15T11:01:00.001-07:00

1St verse:
There's something about the way you look tonight
There's something about the way that I can't take my eyes off you
There's something about the way your lips invite
Maybe it's the way that I get nervous when you're around
And I want you to be mine
And if you need a reason why

1St chorus:
It's in the way that you move me
And the way that you tease me
The way that I want you tonight
It's in the way that you hold me
And in the way that you know me
When I can't find the right words to say
You feel it in the way
Oh you feel it in the way

2Nd verse:
It's something about how you stay on my mind
It's something about the way that
I whisper your name when i'm asleep oh girl
Maybe it's the look you get in your eyes
Oh baby it's the way that makes me feel to see you smile
And the reasons they may change
But what i'm feeling stays the same

2Nd chorus:
It's in the way that you move me
And the way that you tease me
The way that I want you tonight (tonight)
It's in the way that you hold me
And the way that you know me
When I can't find the right words to say
You feel it in the way
Oh you feel it in the way

Bridge:
I can't put my fingers on
Just what it is that makes me
Love you, you baby
So don't ask me to describe
I get all choked up inside
Just thinking about the way

Repeat 2nd chorus (2 xs)

It's something about the way you look tonight
There is nothing more to say than I feel it in the way